Around her neck was a more narrow iron collar, fastened with a large bolt that sat beneath her chin. I had seen "dog collars" like that before on runaway servants and recalcitrant prisoners. Her face and arms were dirty, and her eyes seemed to glow with hatred. The dress she wore was the kind of thing poor farmers' wives dressed in to do their garden work, plain and shapeless, a kind of muddy brown homespun, gaping at her chest, torn at one shoulder."Miss Flannery?" said Lt. Foster with a slight bow. He doffed his hat as the door was locked behind us and the cabin settled into gloom with the only light coming under the door and through chinks in the walls. "May I sit down?"She nodded, and he sat. I stood and admired her artless grace, fine-boned face and wonderful eyes as well as the rise and fall of her chest. She looked both unhappy and angry."Your father is worried about you. He sent this." Foster handed the woman a letter which she placed, unopened, in her lap."I've been here a. Suddenly I realized what was so terrifying about being myself. I was petrified about letting the dominant part of me out. What if they thought I was sick. What if they laughed. Worst of all, what if I hurt somebody? Jesus. That would destroy me.But I was stuck on the horns of a dilemma. I couldn't go back to how I was, that way led nowhere, so I could only go forward, but I didn't know how to make a first step.I was contemplating that when Anna called. I hadn't realized it'd gotten so late. I hadn't eaten anything or moved from the table where Jenny sat down hours ago. Anna's suggestion of take out and movies sounded perfect. It'd been too long since we hung out, as she'd been spending a lot time with her boyfriend Robert, although, I think I heard something about them splitting up. If that was true I hope it hadn't been too bad, but then she usually called me if she needed anything. I recognized my passive stance again, and wondered how much of my life was waiting for other people to.
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